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Paint n Paper

Home Improvements
Watch it transform from hell hole to hovel.  It's amazing what a little paint n paper will do... ok and some tiles.


Something Funny

Don't throw toothpicks in the urinals, crabs pole-vault.  Come back next week for more inspirational

In the News

Family in the news, find highlights over the years here. Photo:  Daily Press photo 2020 of Lawson winning the Rock's Hockey Tournament.


Day 25

Posted 4/5/2020

Day TwentyFive: Today started VERY Early... Heather woke up in a panic at 1am, got up and headed into the kitchen. Now I'm old, I forget stuff, particularly what I put in dinner to make whatever it was I made, it doesn't come from a cookbook, I just make stuff, you know. Sometimes it's pretty good, if it's particularly good I will think back to what's in it and write it down... see it came full circle: I'm old, I forget things. That being said I have the pancake thing written down... it was on a paper in the kitchen. Now back to the main story, Heather is rummaging around in the kitchen at 1am. I try not to bother her when she gets up late at night like this, she normally just goes back to bed unless I talk to her, if we start talking she can be up for an hour rather than just falling back to sleep. She came back in the room, "I can't find it." - I had to ask, "Find What?" - "The paper you wrote the pancake recipe on, it's not in the kitchen." So I got up, went into the kitchen, got the paper off the counter and assured her we still have the vital document and we will survive the holocaust. Well I now know she didn't marry me for my money or my good looks... Reassured that pancakes would reappear in her future at some point, she went back to sleep. In the real morning she got up and made me breakfast in bed, Ham and Cheese Omelet with bacon on the side. After the bed feast I made coffee. Today went a little better than yesterday, we drank the coffee, made the same plan as the day before... but when we were finished the coffee we went to work rather than having a nap. We took all the plants from the pots in our front room. They were rootbound and growing out of the pots, half dead and dry like the desert, not happy plants... We fixed them up, replanted them all, cleaned up the shelves they were on and the front window... it was like Spring Cleaning came early for the plant life in our house. We will grow the new bits and pieces into full side plants and send them to other homes to brave the winter next year. For now, they go back in the window. We got to those 2 buns I kept from eating last night, today they made fine Tuna Sandwiches... tuna never impresses the boy, he made himself hotdog and mustard casserole... I swear I think he believes mustard is a food group, it looked disgusting, thankfully the supply of hotdogs has dried up and he can go back to normal food now. Which prompted him to start looking up recipes on how to make homemade pasta, looks like that may be part of his game plan for this week coming. Honestly it took all day to do the plants, at 4pm I gave up, there are still 2 spider plants that need tending to. Leftovers for dinner, not a hardship, that beef dish we had the other night is even better the next day and we made lots. After dinner Lawson managed to talk Heather into a game of NHL 20 on the Xbox, truly not her cup of tea but she did it anyway. You could hear the boy commentating the game, it was like Rick Jeanneret was in our basement... they say Goalies make the best Commentators, who knows maybe there is a future in it for him. He brought up all his hockey gear from the basement, it's pretty much all dry now. Tomorrow we will go through it and try to get it back in the right bags to put most of it away for the summer... he still has 2 tournaments that haven't been canceled yet so fingers are crossed for those. Tubby time tonight actually involved the boy getting clean in the tub, not his gear. I think he misses hockey... 25 days and counting. After Lawson went to bed I sliced up some meat, Heather made a marinade, we mixed them together and dumped it in the fridge... jerky is on the agenda this week.


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Day 24

Posted 4/4/2020

Day TwentyFour: Up around 8ish... not sure how long Lawson has been playing video games at the foot of our bed, not likely that long, he can be quiet, but not for long. Decided to break the boy of the cereal binge he's been on... chocolate pancakes, with chocolate chips and icing, vanilla of course. Did the same for the wife, but the post apocalypse version, GF and Keto... her eyes actually rolled back in her head and she went back for more, had to finally beat her off with a stick so I could have a little too. Now ours were almost like the boys but rather than the vanilla frosting ours had a hint of coffee flavor, not that I used coffee flavoring, we have beans and a grinder, I did it proper. Topped it off with a cup-a-joe. We had great plans for the day, sat around talking about them for the first bit, then about other stuff, then more side tracking, and a nap... we were on a roll. Then she made some rolls... Once again GF/Keto/Apocalypse (but yummy/not yummy for GF/Keto/Apoco stuff, Yummy by real food standards. Seriously we have this covered. Got out the meat slicer and sliced up some ham and cheese and a few other tasties... sammichies and cheesy garlic bread... drool... A whole day puttering around the kitchen just making up yummy stuff and still not having a cheat day... all in all not a bad day... not a constructive day but meh, who's counting? Wait this is day 24 right... ok we may have had a few drinks too. Lawson had a learning free day, wasted it mostly on video games with his friends and videos. Still 2 buns in the other room calling my name... I should sleep before they get the best of me.

The Chocolate Pancake ExperimentThe Chocolate Pancake ExperimentPhoto: Now I'm sure most of you are not familiar with Gluten Free and Keto cooking... it can be a pain in the ass... this is my own recipe and it's magical... I've always been good at pancakes but this GF/Keto thing really posed a challenge. This is my final masterpiece, the little bubbles in the cake are perfect, the sweetness and flavour are spot on... the little melty chocolate chips a delight and the café buttercream icing which has by this time mostly soaked into the nooks and crannies in the top... definitely orgasmic... and diet food... ROTFLMAO

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Day 23

Posted 4/3/2020

Day TwentyThree: The numbers are getting bigger and I'm regretting using actual numbers... 23... yes that would have been easier... not like I'm stressed for time but... So anyway we were all up by 5:30 for some reason. The shreddies and hotdogs theme is staring to worry me, well we ran out of shreddies and moved to spoon size shredded wheat, still warmer up, the boy is strange. Finished cleaning the hockey gear that was in the tub the other day but it's still not dry enough to put away in the bag for the summer, have to dry it completely or it will smell just as bad in the fall. After lunch we did another chapter of LOTR. Frodo, Sam and Pippin headed east and Lawson wrote about it in French... we tried to get a program working to do spell checking and grammar checking in French (which was a nightmare still don't have that working) it actually took until after Heather got home. Boy continued his appallingly pedestrian eating plan with pasta with only cheese and butter on it... going to have to force him to eat something good tomorrow. However Heather and I couldn't do it, we made some post apocalyptic pizza no yeast (I hear that's the next item on the hoards list of things to deplete from the stores), no flour, no any of that other stuff you use to make crust, but cheese Yes... Lots of cheese and other toppings, 3 or 4 kinds of meat, shrooms, peppers, I don't know other stuff... hey we forgot olives, we have them just forgot them... might have to make another tomorrow just so I can have my olives now. Watched the movie Evolution (about 20 years old) good for a laugh and had a geologist in it, surprised we hadn't seen it already. Oh and renewed the mortgage today... might want to look into that people the rates are pretty good right now.

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Day 22

Posted 4/2/2020

Day TwentyTwo: Late start to the day, Lawson actually requested shreddies today for breakfast... hot of course... have you ever eaten warm shreddies right off the conveyor belt in the factory... We got back to LOTR Book 1 Chapter 2 - Gandalf tells Frodo the story of the ring. Lawson wrote about it in French and posted it to his class group, his teacher corrected it and sent back notes which was cool. HotDogs for lunch, Lawson was in a none foodie mood apparently, hey some times a kid just needs to be a kid. Another load of hockey gear went into the bathtub today and was tended to for most of the afternoon, 3 blockers and 3 leg pads got puck marks removed (something the tub won't do) and we will get to that 4th pad tomorrow... which will only leave about 2 more sets of leg pads and a few more gloves I think... ARGH! I did manage to watch the Play from the National Theater that I posted about... looks like it's going to be well worth my time each Thursday afternoon. They will only be up for a week each, if you watch this week's the Sandwich bit is hysterical.Heather made us dinner, ShortRibs, pasta and CFmash with maybe a little adult beverage on the side. And we did get to watch the minions movie (#3) we tried to watch the other day. A few thumbs up from the peanut gallery there. Gotta finish up that goalie gear tomorrow... hockey's not taking up as much time anymore but still taking it's toll on my time. I think I want pancakes for breakfast. What are you eating?

Melanie Turnbull
- has it really been 22 days??

Rod Turnbull
- Time seems to be flying by... I had so many things I was going to get done around the house... I've barely scratched the surface of the list.

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Day 21

Posted 4/1/2020

Day TwentyOne: Up early this morning to see if the car would vault the hurdle at the end of the driveway... it's still solid ice but melted a little and is shorter than the car now... it drove over it. Check... back in the driveway and inside for breakfast... Egg and Cheese sandwiches travel well. I changed out of my shorts with the big hole in the ass because people don't need to see that and be worried about COVID19 all at the same time. Picked up Short Round and headed to Timmins for life giving medical treatments. The boy and I sat in the car and played video games while the doctor put Short Round though the fix-it machine. We ventured to the grocery store and I continued to just get enough stuff to get by with... it was hard, so many things I normally buy were stocked on the shelves like the box boys had planned on taking the next decade off work AND it was all on sale at stupid low prices. Bought a roast, some fish, eggs, milk and coffee. Hit the self checkout and back home... damn fridge is still full and I need to put things in sideways and upside down to get it all to fit. I use to keep the fridge and cupboards stocked like that because of the size of the family, only a few weeks worth of food... now that I'm not a family of 6 with 3 teenagers, things last a bit longer. Pretty sure with what I bought today and the stuff I have I'm good for another year at home if push comes to shove. Took a decontamination shower and burnt my clothes I wore into town. BTW it doesn't matter how well you clean a tub after the wife uses bath beads in it... don't try to take a shower afterwards without a crash helmet on. Lawson and I started in on LOTR chapter 1, A long expected party... this should be a fairly epic way to fill some time over the next few weeks. LOL - Took me almost a year to read it the first time, don't think I was too much older than him. Still recuperating from the past weekend, didn't get anything useful done in the house today which lead to breakfast for dinner... Which all in all is never a bad thing, I do make some of the best omelettes on the planet... and well bacon... need I say more. We sat down to watch a movie but then lost the boy to an urgent phone call from one of the boys friends who needed to play RoBlox or something like that I believe. The movie (Despicable Me 3) is now on hold until tomorrow. I still smell Bacon... Damn, that's going to keep me up all night.

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Day 20

Posted 3/31/2020

Day Twenty: Started much as the day before, still sore, over did it by a long shot on the weekend, yesterday I could barely count to 3, today I can make it to 10 but still don't plan on making it out of bed. A rare bowl of cereal was eaten by the boy for breakfast, a check in with his school group on facebook and then some mindless Minecraft videos. He did help me make Perogies for lunch, I ate one... I shouldn't have, definitely not on the GF list of food, pretty sure I'm going to pay for that. Took out a few bags of Prawns for dinner, yesterday's edumacational video left us with a hankering for farmed crustaceans... Hmmm... how thick does the concrete need to be in a bomb shelter to keep safe from radioactive spiders? Better question, how much concrete can you put in the back of a Subaru Outback before the axles snap off? Maybe I should dig out a trailer. Heather did make the Shrimp for dinner in a nice alfredo sauce served over spiralized zucchini... very nice, had to go back for more... hindsight being what it is I should have got out a bottle of white wine to go with it. After dinner we passed on the movie tonight and the boy talked me into a game of Bloons Tower Defence 6... He on his tablet and me on the cell phone... not a huge amount of power going on there... the game gets a little intense around level 150+, we play until the devices run out of memory and the game craps out. A little evening carnage so get one ready for bed. Hey some people count sheep, boy likes to blow shit up. Went to bed better than normal.

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Day 19

Posted 3/30/2020

Day Nineteen: Too sore to blink, going to be mostly in bed today... Lawson and I were both up around 6am... said good morning to each other and promptly went back to sleep until almost 10am. Researched a project on the internet and got Lawson set up with his teacher and school group which might be all the schooling he gets for the rest of the year. Made Keto Pizza for dinner, which I have to say is still better than any regular pizza in a restaurant up here, which still isn't saying much. Watched a video on Honduras... issues with Prawn Farming, an interesting contrast between the people who work for the big company and those who don't... and a confirmation that most activists are total mindless whack jobs.

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Day 18

Posted 3/29/2020

Day Eighteen: We lost a loved one to what we can only assume was COVID-19 today... well might have been yesterday or the day before but he's gone now and that's the point. For the past 5 years or so we have had a little friend that frequents our home... fills up on our tasty bugs and continues on his way for a few weeks but always comes back. His broken little body laid in a pile of rubble from the StrongHold construction, he is no more... I will miss our Shrew. RIP March 2020. BRB Going to wash my hands again. So I was working on the bomb shelter in the basement, putting up some shelves with the help of Lawson while the Wife unleashed her cooking prowess in the kitchen... we got Cinnamon Rolls today at only 3 carbs each... At which point you do what any rational person would do, you eat cinnamon rolls for breakfast, but not to be totally barbaric about it, I made a pot of coffee. The boy bolted the majority of the substructure together and screwed on the sheeting in readiment for the special lead lining and foot of concrete to shield us from unwanted energy waves and malicious prying government satellites floating above. By dinner time I could no longer function, feels like I was hit by a truck... definitely too much work this weekend. Heather made softshell tacos for dinner with the pulled pork, very yummy, she found the good recipe she had lost, we won't let that happen again, taped it to the flatbread press. At some point in the day Lawson sucked Heather into playing hockey on the video game in the basement, this happens more often than Heather would like. LOL... they switched over to chess after a while to make it more fair... Mommy never learn to play games as a kid, their board game skill are more evenly matched then the video games. I found one more video tonight to add to the Guatemala viewing... we saw the temples and jungles and reefs but never really got much of what normal life was like there... one title had it listed as the most dangerous place on earth that wasn't at war. So we checked out that angle. He like the video with the sharks best so far. Can't sleep, too sore... maybe I will go eat another cinnamon bun. 

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Day 17

Posted 3/28/2020

Day Seventeen: Woke up at 8am, blinked, then it was 10:30... apparently I missed peanut butter toast... didn't even smell it, I must have been tired. Made my own damn breakfast and while eating made a plan of attack for the day. Finish bunker reinforcement... add another 200 cubic feet of storage, sealed, locked, hidden from potential raiders... shit, all day and I only got one board put in and was too beat to go on... might have been having to deal with someone else's prior concrete job, meh... Apparently while I did that Lawson went out and shoveled the walkway and put down some salt... haven't used that since they changed the law and burglars are not allowed to sue you for slipping on your icy driveway... since then I've just kept a bucket of silverware and a cheap camera by the door so if someone falls I can go out quickly, sprinkle the silverware around them and snap a photo of them lying on the ground amidst the ill gotten booty... case closed. Not sure what the 2 of them had for lunch but they didn't bring me any... and they wonder why I don't work around the house so much, it's because if I work through lunch no one feeds me... I did get Dinner, Heather made pulled pork and coleslaw, I put that on the last bun and Lawson asked why we were eating so many sandwiches (he hates them, one a week is too many)... I took his toast out of the toaster, buttered it, cut it in half, put it on his plate with the pulled pork and slaw, said there... you don't have to have a sandwich... I should have put plate dividers between his foods so they didn't actually touch each other. This evening we watched a documentary on Belize, I knew not of the extent of the reef there...and Heather goes, 'Those are the hammerhead sharks that were under our canoe! Lawson asked it they were the exact same ones or other hammerhead sharks that just looked like those ones... because Heather hates sharks and he likes to push her buttons... I explained to him that it wasn't far from there and the time frame was correct so it could be some of the same sharks and confirmed that is was our white canoe he's been in... he didn't realize how many places we've canoed with it or how old it was. We are working our way through Central America, tomorrow maybe Honduras.

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Day 16

Posted 3/27/2020

Day Sixteen: (Without hockey in Canada) - Everybody is starting to have their own countdowns from arbitrary dates... pretty sure mine is the most accurate beginning of the end. The boy ate the last Bagel this morning (still have ample cream cheese), might have to make some more this weekend (Bagels not the cream cheese). Started the day off with some edumacation. Guatemala, why not learn about Guatemala... not on the curriculum you say? Fuck the curriculum, that's the number one rule about homeschooling, find those documents on the internet, print them out, organize them, read them... then just fucking burn them... there is so much to learn about out there some kids finish school and still have no idea which way is up, or what they want to be when they grow up, what opportunities they are missing out on... our education system is a big box... the only way to think outside the box is live outside the box. Shit that's a little too deep for facebook isn't it. Found some homemade Italian Wedding soup in the freezer today, had that for lunch in memory of all the losses to the plague in Italy. Cleaned up the kitchen some more... didn't want to get into the dishwasher yet so we played a little more minecraft. Canceled the call to have the driveway cleared out... they never came, I figure it will melt before anyone actually takes a shovel to it, summer is coming. Put those buns Heather made to good use along with some leftover turkey... Lawson monopolised the phone and played some Fortnight with his friends until he hit the tub then went to bed... Heather crashed at about 7pm, pretty much looks dead, worked 11 of the last 12 days so I'm not going to wake her... And you all thought I wasn't that smart... LOL... See, you were wrong again. 

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